The word God gave me for this year was "Courageous" and the verse He has been giving me is the 12th chapter in Romans. 

I knew this year was going to be a year of change. 

I knew this year was going to have some do or die choices.

I knew this year was going to be challenging.

I knew this year was going to be life changing.

I knew this year God was going to do Miracles.

I had no idea that what God has in store for me is beyond my belief. I always thought that it always happens to other people but not me... 

I. Am. Blown. Away. 

I have no idea what is going to take place. How it is going to happen. When it is going to happen. But I know it is happening! 

click, click, click, chink, chink, the pieces are falling into place. The safe is about to be opened. The clicks are falling into place and starting to resound into deeper places. Another day, another piece. A week later it is that closer to opening the safe. It is not open yet, but it is getting closer.

God you are amazing! Eph 3:20(MSG) God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.

My ALL

A week ago I wrote this on a fb post...

Okay, so I've been in the Word more this week. It is changing me and there are already things happening in my life. BUT, I watched my Favorite movie tonight and it brought something new to my attention... Am I Giving My All To God? Am I Laying It All On The Field? Am I Holding Anything Back From Him?... That answer would be NO! I'm not giving to Him my everything, I am holding back from Him. I still fear rejection. I still don't think I'm worthy. I still go through life not living Fully Alive.

I am not saying these things for me, but to challenge You. Are you giving Everything to Him? If so, Fantastic! If not, come beside me walk with me. I want God to have complete control over my life! Even If...

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:26-28 

And here it is a week and a day later and I am struggling to keep this my priority. My brain keeps wandering to the things I want and desire. I specifically believe God is impressing on me to keep Him the focus and He will make me "attractive" and "desirable" to the one He wants me to be with. How much I so want to take over and do things my way. How do I stop this ingrained control? 

I want Him to be my ALL! My EVERYTHING! My every DESIRE! Yet I feel so powerless to control my thoughts. Even as I write this I feel Him taking over control. I ask forgiveness during service this morning and felt that healing balm seep into my soul. So I come before you Lord again, Please forgive me for allowing my thoughts and desires to envelope my day to push Your Presence aside. Lord I want You! You are my Lord!

It doesn't matter if or when there is ever a man that can love me. You are ALL I need! Please protect my mind to be the mind of Christ.