My ALL

A week ago I wrote this on a fb post...

Okay, so I've been in the Word more this week. It is changing me and there are already things happening in my life. BUT, I watched my Favorite movie tonight and it brought something new to my attention... Am I Giving My All To God? Am I Laying It All On The Field? Am I Holding Anything Back From Him?... That answer would be NO! I'm not giving to Him my everything, I am holding back from Him. I still fear rejection. I still don't think I'm worthy. I still go through life not living Fully Alive.

I am not saying these things for me, but to challenge You. Are you giving Everything to Him? If so, Fantastic! If not, come beside me walk with me. I want God to have complete control over my life! Even If...

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:26-28 

And here it is a week and a day later and I am struggling to keep this my priority. My brain keeps wandering to the things I want and desire. I specifically believe God is impressing on me to keep Him the focus and He will make me "attractive" and "desirable" to the one He wants me to be with. How much I so want to take over and do things my way. How do I stop this ingrained control? 

I want Him to be my ALL! My EVERYTHING! My every DESIRE! Yet I feel so powerless to control my thoughts. Even as I write this I feel Him taking over control. I ask forgiveness during service this morning and felt that healing balm seep into my soul. So I come before you Lord again, Please forgive me for allowing my thoughts and desires to envelope my day to push Your Presence aside. Lord I want You! You are my Lord!

It doesn't matter if or when there is ever a man that can love me. You are ALL I need! Please protect my mind to be the mind of Christ. 

One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp... stretching me, waking me up, breaking me, molding me, challenging me.

Quote "God is always good and I am always loved" pg 100

"Everything is eucharisteo." (Grace, Thanksgiving, Joy)

"Because eucharisteo is how Jesus, at the Last Supper, showed us to transfigure all things--take the pain that is given, give thanks for it, and transform it into a joy that fulfills all emptiness. I have glimpsed it; This, the hard eucharisteo. The hard discipline to lean into the ugly and whisper thanks to transfigure it into beauty. The hard discipline to give thanks for all things at all times because He is all good. The hard discipline to number the griefs as grace because as the surgeon would cut open my son's finger to heal him, so God chooses to cut into my ungrateful heart to make me whole." pg 100/101

Make me whole Lord. Even if it hurts. Help me Lord to be faithful, to be grateful, to have joy and be full of grace.

Two people gave me a word today.
Person #1 as I walked in the door of church... God has got something for you today. (definatly paraphrased)

Person #2 after church while talking to friends when meeting one of their friends... God will do what he has promised you he would, I have to do what I'm suppose to do and He will complete it.

Oh yeah, a word was given to the church that fits as well... God has not forgotten the call that He has called you to. If that call may gotten off track, but it is still there.

All of these are words that I have been needing. I still have a call on my life and I know it, but where I'm at seems "weird" for a forward motion on that call.

I also sponsered a child today. CryofIndia.org If I am not able to adopt right now at least I can sponser one. I hope God will change her world. He has changed mine!

I love You Lord!

Dr Tony Evans says in his Daily Devotion on Crosswalk

His Glory Won't Be Shared

In His Presence: We all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit (2 Corinthians 3:18).

God will share His glory with no man. If you are not passionately pursuing the glory of God, He is not hanging out with you because He won't share His glory. The reason He has saved you, the reason He elected you, the reason you are a child of God is to make you part of the community of people called the church, which exists for His glory alone.

We are dealing with the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, the Creator of the universe, and we just give Him the leftovers in our lives. We are reluctant to adjust to what He wants. We won't redo our schedules or our plans because this is our life. But to ascribe glory to Him is to give Him recognition and authority in our lives. Jesus said in John 17:4: "I glorified You . . . having accomplished the work which You have given Me to do." Remember also that Jesus prayed before His death: "For this purpose I came to this hour. Father, glorify Your name" (John 12:27-28). Christ died for the glory of God.

Can you say that in difficult times you will submit to the Lord's purpose and trust that He will be glorified? God uses all things for His glory. Once we look into the mirror of His glory, we will find that He can transform our hearts, and whatever He wants us to do, He takes responsibility for providing for it to be done.
One Minute Please
Whatever you do in word or deed, He wants you to wake up, and go to bed, with Him in mind. And if you do, He'll transform you.

This is my biggest issue. I need to make God my focus of the day, not my rebound after I'm shot.

Lord help me to focus on You each minute and let You lead my day.

#1--"So let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up." Galatians 6:9 NLT

#2--Don't be deceived. You are not under Satan's power or subject to his authority. You are in Christ above all demonic rule, authority and power.

#3--In our attempts to become more mature as Christians, we grow a little at a time. God doesn't expect us to be perfect right away. He knows that our growth takes time. The same is true of our attempts to lose weight. We need to take it a little at a time. Crash diets and heavy exercise programs are not the way to go. Our Christian growth should provide us with an example. Let us approach our diets with patience and take it a small step at a time.

#4--God can reverse every curse in your life - from the financial and physical to the generational and spiritual. The prophet Elisha would not accept payment from General Naaman for God's restoration of the warrior's health, but the prophet's servant Gehazi couldn't resist. He lied, took the payment and hid it. Elisha knew what Gehazi had done and rebuked him for jumping ahead of God's provision and blessing. Gehazi set himself up for failure, and his punishment was the curse of leprosy.
Seven years later because of God's divine arrangement, Gehazi was able to take and hide a load of riches from an abandoned Syrian camp. A changed man, Gehazi generously shared the loot with the children of Israel, and God restored his health and promoted him to the king's advisory board.
If you are wrestling with a curse, or have given in to its control, God wants to accomplish something in you greater than just getting rid of your problems. Put your trust in God and obey His Word, and you too, like Gehazi, can enjoy a comeback.

These are all from different devotionals that I read today. Sounds like a theme. Don't give up, Use the power of God, Grow deeper one day at a time, and God can turn your failure into His Glory.

After watching a webcast with Lysa TerKeurst, I am feeling very empowered to change my life. Please Lord give me the power to walk one day at a time in Your word, living with Your power, defeating the lies I've believed, and making choices that are beneficial to my health.

Thank you Lord, for I know you have heard my prayer and You know I want Your will for my life. I love you Lord!

Would you consider getting serious with me?

As like a man speaks to a love interest, "Would you consider getting serious?" God is speaking to me... Would you consider getting serious with Me?

When I went thru my divorce I sought after healing. I listened to teaching tapes everyday, was at every class that I could make at my church, begged God for His Presence and I got my healing. My broken heart was mended.

Now, I am still in the word, but squeeze it in at the end of the day. Tired and sleepy with the day's frustrations overshadowing God's presence. I live with Him everyday, but have shuffled life ahead of My Savior.

Would you consider getting serious with Me? Yes Lord, I would love to get serious with you... I know this means dying to self... Stopping habits that are not beneficial to me... Starting habits I have put off because they "seem" too hard... Living my every waking hour pursuing You...

Help me Lord to pursue You! Help me to break the chains that bind me. Help me to live deeper in Your Word.

Don't let me settle for my dreams, but let me desire what You have for me. For I know what you desire for me is far greater that I could ever hope for, dream or imagine.

I love you Lord. I want You to be my Everything!

Thoughts for today

I love to listen the WBCL's mid morning program. It speaks to me everyday, whether it be on marriage, singleness, health, relationships, anger, loss, or whatever, it always tugs at my heart.

Today's program was Dr Hawkins speaking on marriage and how a little offense can turn into a festered sore spot. How true is that?! One of my take away moments Lynne spoke about on her blog. "But celebration is marital Gatorade, providing refreshment and reestablishing balance to out-of-whack feelings." In my words, Fun is the replenishing drink after a long dry battle of life.

Thank you Lynne and Bekah for a great program.

Today, woke up early and lit the fire and read some verses and ended up falling asleep on the floor in front of the fireplace. woke up and continued my nap on the couch. I think my sleep is starting to get caught up.

Now I'm getting some homework done and soon will have to go get supplies for the dish to make for tonight's party. I'm praying to get everything done in the next few days so I can really focus on my final. I'm ready to get this semester over with but am really nervous about next semester. Lord bless my efforts with His design for my life. Thank You.